Jump to content
The BIGGEST COmPetition we've ever done! Read more... ×
Move over Eurovision! COPvision is back! Read more... ×

Monster High

Dear America, Wake The Fuck Up & Let Dua Lipa Happen

Recommended Posts

I have officially snapped.

First, "Be the One" flopped and I didn't say anything because Dua Lipa was a new artist and I always expect Americans to have trash opinions about gorgeous new things.

 

 

Then, "Blow Your Mind" didn't chart and I stayed silent because honestly "Be the One" out-gorgeous'd it and if "Be the One" couldn't smash then how could "Blow Your Mind"?

 

 

But now, NOW is the time I finally speak up. "New Rules" isn't a massive hit and it's time for me to say choo choo motherfuckers, wake the fuck up, and hop on the Dua Lipa train.

 

 

Let me explain this situation to those of you not in the know.

Dua Lipa is a gorgeous singer and vocalist with bops for days. If you haven't heard of her before this weird BuzzFeed post, then I'm jealous. Your life is about to dramatically improve.

sub-buzz-26904-1503418423-1.jpg?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

Here's something you need to know: "New Rules" is the actual song of summer.

anigif_sub-buzz-10448-1503418354-1.gif?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

The UK may be on the wrong side of history when it comes to consuming mushy peas, but they know a thing or two about giving credit to bops where credit is due. "New Rules" is the No. 1 song in the country right now.

sub-buzz-21101-1503418198-3.png?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

But get this: Because Americans are trash, "New Rules" is only #81 in the US. That, my friends, is deeply unsettling and problematic.

sub-buzz-15510-1503416148-3.png?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

"New Rules" is important for many reasons but among those is the positive messages it gives gays, all of your friends, and people in problematic relationships. The rules spelled out in the song are simple:

1. Don't pick up the phone. You know he's only calling 'cause he's drunk and alone.

2. Don't let him in, you'll have to kick him out again.

3. Don't be his friend, you know you're gonna wake up in his bed in the morning.

And if you're under him, you ain't getting over him.

The song's message has had tremendous impact on people.

sub-buzz-10973-1503419572-18.png?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

sub-buzz-22131-1503419615-2.png?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

sub-buzz-22274-1503419668-1.png?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

What's the point of this BuzzFeed post? Literally nothing. I'm just fucking pissed and want to scream about something. I want to be able to walk into Rite Aid and bop to "New Rules." I want to turn on the TV and hear it in some shitty skin care commercial. For God's sake, I just want my grandma to call her "Dual IPA" or something.

sub-buzz-22864-1503420966-6.jpg?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

So America, this is a call to action. We can't let "Despashito" rot on the top of the charts when "New Rules" is simply better.

sub-buzz-28665-1503421231-8.jpg?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

Call me anti-American all you want but that's not the case. I LOVE MY DAMN COUNTRY BUT I ALSO KNOW WHAT'S BEST FOR IT AND THAT'S DUA LIPA.

sub-buzz-28603-1503421148-5.jpg?downsize=715:*&output-format=auto&output-quality=auto

Get on the right side of history, make "New Rules" a hit.

 

 

Source

  • Upvote 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Impossible Prince said:

She has bops but lbr she's not special

Edit: getting a downvote for sharing my opinion lmao

i got u ur upvote Back

Thank Me Later  :rihslay:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×