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Dr3ch

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About Dr3ch

  • Birthday 10/26/1994

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  1. Dr3ch

    Am I trans?

    So I have been dealing with the fear that I might be transgender. I have OCD and an anxiety disorder so it's common for me to obsess over something and develop a great fear over it. I never struggled with my gender or even thought about it. It was normal for me to be male and gay. I don't have the desire to become a female or wear girl clothes, well at least I don't think I have the desire to do it. I took many tests and talked with a professional about this. The results were all the same, that I am not. But the thing is that I keep on doubting myself or that these thoughts always have been there and I just oppressed them... In moments like this, I know that I am not but I just keep on coming back to the thought and it is like torture. I feel like becoming a girl would be terrible for me since I don't feel like one. I do feel like that I will take the submissive role in a relationship at least in some areas of it. I like my penis and I dress quite masculine. What are your thoughts on this? Am I becoming trans? Or is this just my OCD again...
  2. Yesterday I told everyone I knew that I've been telling a lie about love my life and build a fictional persona, that's been going on for six years. I am glad the truth is out. The reaction was positive and supportive. But TOCD came back and other intrusive thoughts. I can't sleep right, and somehow I can't get out of bed. My flat is full with trash, clothes, paper, food, smoked cigarettes and other stuff. Everything is so fucking messy... I just can't get up to clean. I know I have to, but I can't. I have bills to pay but can't seem to make it to the bank. I have to study for an exam in a few months but haven't touched a book. I just want to sleep, like forever. I want to work out and go to the gym but I somehow can't. I am in therapy for the intrusive thoughts. I want to turn my life around but it's too much work. I just want to be a normal dude. I want to feel normal again. Any tips?
  3. Do you write your own songs or poems? Share them here with the community. I'll start: Verse 1 Well, you done me good, you done me bad I even wanted you, while you were with him in my bed Protected you from everything, build a fucking heaven in your eyes You, why always you? Get out of my house, it’s closed for you Needed money, needed attention, needed a fool, I am thru with you Chorus I won’t order it anymore Our special place is gone It’s closed, due to poison in the food Oh my god, I can’t believe I fell for you I should’ve known your love was nothing but á la carte Verse 2 Lord, please don’t let me do it twice I am not even hurt, I am just relieved I don’t think I loved you that much Desire for your body was the only thing on my mind I was over it the minute my heart smiled, you couldn’t damage it I won’t order it anymore Our special place is gone It’s closed, due to poison in the food Oh my god, I can’t believe I fell for you I should’ve known your love was nothing but á la carte I won’t order it anymore Our special place is gone It’s closed, due to poison in the food Oh my god, I can’t believe I fell for you I should’ve known your love was nothing but á la carte I should’ve known your love was nothing but á la carte I should’ve known your love was nothing but á la carte I should’ve known your love was nothing but á la carte Bridge Champagne with roses, caviar so damn exclusive Finer things in my stomach Lobster with Chardonnay Fresh whipped cream with golden meat I am so done with ordering from the same old menu Chorus I won’t order it anymore Our special place is gone It’s closed, due to poison in the food Oh my god, I can’t believe I fell for you I should’ve known your love was nothing but á la carte Your love was a lá carte
  4. sure. Let me upload something proper.
  5. I will start. https://vocaroo.com/i/s0iFuRENQElr Use this: https://vocaroo.com
  6. Dr3ch

    Am I a coward?

    I got into a bar fight the other night, I was almost blackout drunk, one dude kept on provoking and insulting me, the waitress said I should get away but my drunk ass wasn't having it. So I went back and tried talking to him, later on, we agreed to fight (I could barely stand or walk and let alone fight), he then took a few blows and I fell on the ground, this is where everything turned black for a few minutes, as I woke up the police was already there and a few eye-witnesses said that he and a few of his friends were kicking me while I was on the ground unable to move. He did call me a faggot, and also told me to piss off but I was getting along with the girl on their table. So today I decided to call the police and a few hours after that, he got arrested... He now is facing jail time because he is on probation. I know I am not 100% in the right since my drunk-self wanted to fight but I was clearly unable to even fight proper. (This was the first time ever I got into a fight, so I usually don't act like this) He allegedly thought my dancing was gay and got angry about it. What should I do? Should I try to drop charges? Should I just do it anyway since I had to go to the hospital? Am I a coward for this?
  7. Dr3ch

    I got beat up.

    I mean I did provoke him after he insulted me and I did agree to fight. But my alcohol level was at 1,7... so there was no chance I could've done any damage. I don't know about the watch, to be honest. Is it normal that I feel a little bit guilty?
  8. Dr3ch

    I got beat up.

    well, okay... I have to admit I provoked him after he insulted me and I did get angry, too. So I think I agreed to fight but still, I could barely walk from all the alcohol. I didn't have had any chance. But I took the advice you all gave me and really thought about it, he got arrested afterwards and now is going to jail for a little bit of time since he was on probation. I got my karma with the scars and broken ego and now he is getting his with a little bit of jail time. Opinions?
  9. My injuries from the bar fight seem to get worse. Everything hurts so bad, but what hurts the most is, that I've lost. 

  10. Dr3ch

    I got beat up.

    So I made up my mind. I just can't let this happen to me again and I definitely want revenge. I am going to start with Krav Maga and MMA because what happened only showed to me that I have to learn to defend myself.
  11. Dr3ch

    I got beat up.

    I did call the cops but they didn't do shit because I was drunk. So there's that. So you guys say that I just should let them get away with it? I do want to hurt them, tho. I know I acted a fool but violence is not an option.
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